Another Allergic Reaction and Other Autoimmune Updates

 I guess it's time for another update about my autoimmune life.  I've had another medical emergency this past week.  Tuesday night, I took my first dose of Carbamazepine for my Bipolar mood swings.  I had an appointment scheduled with the prescribing doctor the next morning, Wednesday.  Well, when I woke up Wednesday morning, I had a rash starting on my chest.  When I met with the doctor, we decided to stop the medication, which I had already decided that without his input as soon as I saw the rash starting.  We decided to just get back to a more natural state for now and will discuss adding a new medication on our next appointment.  He told me what allergic reactions to look for and a sore throat was one of the things that he mentioned.  I woke up Thursday morning with a sore throat and the rash was much, much worse than the night before.  

After doing a bit of research, I decided that it would be best if I went to Urgent Care again.  I was there the week before with an allergic reaction to the medication, Ajovy.  That reaction was treated with a 6-day steroid taper pack.  It helped almost immediately, so my hope was that I would be able to get another round of that or something similar.  I got what I wished for.  I was prescribed 20 mg of Prednisone a day for 5 days.  I was also prescribed Famotidine, as it has some antihistamine effects, as well.  That was news to me, but interesting, just the same.  The doctor also prescribed cetirizine, or Zyrtec, to help with the itching from the rash.  I took the steroid tablet as soon as I left the pharmacy and before I even got home, most of the redness was gone and the itching was much, much better.  I have now been on the steroid for three days, and I hardly have any rash, redness or itching left.  It looks a little splotchy, but that is it.  

This entire ordeal has made me very nervous to try new drugs.  I'm afraid that every drug is going to cause some kind of a reaction for me.  I'm exceedingly hypomanic lately and it's getting difficult to deal with, but treating the condition is becoming more and more difficult for me.  How can we treat it when I'm allergic to most of the medications available?  I'm starting to think I'm just going to have to deal with the effects of Bipolar mania for the rest of my miserable life.  It's not easy to live like this.  I have racing, intrusive thoughts 24/7, even when I'm asleep and the first thing when I wake up.  I never get a break from it.  The hypersexuality caused by Bipolar mania is a lot to deal with, and I even went out gambling last night and I haven't done that since moving to Washington over five years ago.  Michael works at the casino, and I have managed to avoid gambling there for the six months he has worked there, but last night, I just couldn't help myself.  I think I probably need to reach out to my psychiatrist and let him know where I am at with this episode.  He's a good doctor.  He will get me help, for sure.  

I ran a lot of errands this past week and did a lot of things alone, so my body is revolting against me today.  I am in the mother of all flares today and I am almost regretting all of my decisions since last weekend.  I went to a friend's wedding last Saturday and I am still hurting from it.  I love that I was able to be there to support her; I just wish my body didn't hate on me afterwards.  Even knowing how badly I would hurt, I would still go to the wedding all over again.  When you are autoimmune or have chronic illness, you learn to make choices in life.  If you want to be a part of certain social events, you have to accept that you will be in more pain afterwards.  I knew it and still chose to go.  On Wednesday, I walked over 8,000 steps in the heat and sun, and I paid for that dearly, too.  I got sick from the heat, was dehydrated and had to go straight home before going to see Michael for a coffee date.  I never made it to that date, and I still feel awful about it.  Michael didn't make me feel bad or anything.  He was very understanding, which was crucial in me not beating myself up over it.  He and I both know that I have no control over my health.  It is what it is.  

When I went to the Urgent Care center about the second allergic reaction, I went by myself.  Avery offered to go with me again, but I chose to go alone and just face whatever was going to happen, on my own.  It just felt like the right thing to do.  Michael had to be at work, or he would have gladly accompanied me, and I would have let him, but it ended up being no big deal that I went alone.  I was blessed with a female doctor, so there was no anxiety about a male coming in to touch me and possibly see my breasts, as that is where part of the rash was covering.  I reached out to the ladies from group, and they gave me a lot of moral support, which was amazing while I was facing hard things.  They all know about my battle to do things alone and to get over the anxiety that stops me from going alone, so they celebrate every little milestone with me.  It's so nice to have friends that actually get it.  I made it through the appointment, pharmacy trip, bus trips, talking to strangers, etc.  I managed to do it all and have absolutely no issue the entire time.  That was a blessing in and of itself.  The last time that I was alone, I cried because nobody was there to help me open my bottle and it took a very long time for me to figure out that I could do it with my shirt.  Sigh...  Brain fog is a bitch!

I have been stressing about who I am going to ask to drive me to my rheumatologist appointment at the end of the month, and one of the lovely ladies from group offered to take me to the appointment.  It is out of state, although not far out of state.  It's only about an hour away, but the appointment is where there is no bus to take me, so I am stuck getting help from other people and that has always been a terrifying prospect for me to face.  Trust is difficult for me because I have been let down so very many times in the past.  I am grateful that my friend has offered to take me to the appointment.  The good news is that Medicaid will pay her extra money for taking me there.  They will pay mileage and all the extras.  I'm nervous as Hell over this appointment as I have not seen a rheumatologist for my Scleroderma since November of 2024.  That's never a good idea with a disease like this one.  I'm just grateful that I have a circle of people that genuinely care for me and care about what happens to me.  I am so grateful to Lori for starting this group that helped me to make friendships that feel like they will last through this lifetime and that is a beautiful feeling.  

Until next time...